But, with that being said, adopting these new beliefs when you have believing their super-crappy polar opposites for so long, will not happen at the snap of a finger. And, as I always say regarding this likely course of events, it’s okay. You want to start with where you are now, and work your way up. But, don’t be discouraged by this and think you can’t get anything good until you totally overcome your issues, and obtain some’ perfect’ vibration. I don’t think anyone has one. I imagine achieving that would result in not wanting anything at all.


In stopping all other thoughts you also stop resistance. Resistance is the negative emotion you feel when you think about what you want, but in a way that feels bad. It is when you give more attention to what you don’t have, and feel bad, rather than giving attention to what you want, in a way that feels good to you. In both cases you are thinking about what you wish to manifest, however one is focused in a way that allows it manifest, and the other is focused on the lack of what you want, and that keeps it from coming.

You need to be clear about what you truly want in a relationship, there are lots of questions to be asked here, and the crucial thing is that you be honest with yourself.  Is it a life-long relationship?  Is it a traditional “get married”, raise a family relationship? Is it a committed relationship living apart?  You must decide what you truly want; sending the universe mixed messages via your thoughts will only lead to people who want different types of relationships coming into your life.
Falling in and out of love is another concept that has been deeply studied. So, how would you know that you are definitely in love with him or her? Are there any indications that will help you understand whether you should fall for the particular person? In simple words, love doesn’t knock your door with permission. It simply does! Your work is to understand it and go with the flow.
I have a funny story to share though and it’s not about my experience, it’s about my Mom’s. She got a letter in the mail late last year from a lawyer asking her information because her best friend of over 50 year’s husband had passed away and he was leaving her some money. Never in a million years would she had ever expected that. He was a tight wad, as we like to call them here in Texas. They didn’t have any children and she had passed away about five years earlier. Anyway he’s always given money to the college where he went and everyone just assumed that’s where it would go. Let me also clarify that the man was filthy rich!
“I made a list of the qualities I wanted in a partner- integrity, someone I find very attractive, commitment, focus, ambition, kindness. Then I realised they were qualities I wanted to embody more in myself, too. So I meditated on this following doing a Universe List prayer- in which I asked the Universe to ‘reveal these qualities in myself’ and ‘inspire me to more fully embody them’. Firstly, what happened is I received compliments from friends of how I reminded them of certain well-known people- and how younger and healthier I was looking. I began feeling calmer and more comfortable being me. I was happier being single than ever before and then ‘happened’ to go to a friend’s dinner party when I met the most wonderful man.”
Jim Carey is infamous now for having done this specific thing in his life. In 1985 through 87, Carrey would drive up onto Mulholland Drive in Los Angeles, looking at houses, and he would imagine all of these things in his. He would imagine the big house, the cars, respect from directors, more opportunities than he knew what to do with, and so on. Keep in mind, at the time he was flat broke.
At this stage, the principle of ‘Divine and Perfect Timing’ will put you and your Soulmate together at the right place and at the right time for you to meet. Your job from this point forward is to continue to hold the intention of the ‘what’, while you let God or the Universe figure out the ‘when’ or the ‘how’. Why? Because we cannot control the time and place when this will happen, but we certainly can control our ability to feel good, be optimistic, open to love and continue to do the necessary inner work that will magnetize our soulmate to us.
I decided that that goal was to make $100,000 that year. I created an image of a $100,000 dollar bill and hung it on the ceiling above my bed. Every morning I’d see the image. I’d visualize what it would be like to have $100,000. Everything I did was to achieve that goal. At the end of the year, I had made $97,000. This would never have been possible without the Law of Attraction, these visualization techniques, and meditation.  
When we don’t treat ourselves well, that is a sign of low self-esteem; it sends a message we are not ‘worthy’ of love and care. And guess what will be reflected back into your reality? Taking better care of yourself, and treating yourself with the respect and love you deserve, will help shore up beliefs that say ‘I am good enough.’ ‘I deserve someone who treats me well.’
Hi SKA, The Law of Attraction creates through your thoughts, words and beliefs. If you read back over what you wrote and take all the negative thoughts and change them to positives, and read these regularly, you’ll soon see a shift in your vibration that will help you be with her. You can use this technique to change things with any person, even your best friend. You don’t just have to use these Law of Attraction techniques on a specific person you love.
“I spent years stuck in problems and anxiety and wasn’t enjoying life at all. I discovered the Law of Attraction through a book and things got a little better, but it wasn’t until I discovered your website (and workshops) that things really began to change. I’m realising that it’s all about whether I am ‘tuned in’ or not. I’m finding it easier to be ok when I’m not feeling so good, too, which before was very difficult for me. I am also finding that people in my life seem to naturally ‘get it’ and live better lives without me trying to change their mind set (which I was prone to doing before). It seems like my connection naturally influences those around me and I don’t need to work things out when it comes to other people, as Life does that. Meditation I am really enjoying, I never realised how important it was when it comes to applying the Law of Attraction before your events. And a testimonial for you: After nearly 15 years of being single, when I had given up many times over, I met my ‘one’. I didn’t need to try to find him, we just met through friends when I was least expecting it. I can see how your work relaxed me and made the whole process effortless. Thank you.”
“I was in a bar and the three people I spoke to (or rather came to speak to me) thought I was ten years younger than I am. There was a time when people guessed I was ten years older! It also happens more often in my day to day life, getting compliments and admiring looks. Unsurprisingly, I’d been writing this on my Universe List and Focusing process every day. Then last week I met someone who almost fitted my ideal partner- another match to the Focusing Process! I’ll keep you updated!”
The great thing about being after a feeling is we can conjure it up anytime we want, regardless of what is happening now. What feelings are you seeking? How can you feel that way now? What can you focus on in your present reality that makes you feel abundant? Even though I wasn’t thrilled I was literally living off credit cards, I shifted perspective, and developed a sense of appreciation for having them as an option. I focused on the sense of security I felt from having my rent paid for the month, and knowing I could buy food and was not going to starve.

Living “as if” can be a powerful way to help yourself to manifest love. What this means is that you should try to live every day not as though you’re looking for love but as though you’ve already found it! Embrace self-love and dress as you would if you were spending time with your partner. Try to make space for them in your home. See yourself as a person with a loving soulmate and a bright future, and make plans accordingly.

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